The Senioritis Series: Hyperbole-Full Animal Control


Nataly Lugo, Staff Writer

You get to school tired, hoping to get by with your day and not bump into annoying people. Instead, you bump into a TMNT-sized rodent surrounded foot-long cockroaches with wasps flying above.

I went to my science class and halfway through, something small and furry ran from one side of the room to the other and the teacher acted like it was no big deal. He said, and I quote, “Oh, that must be the baby. I caught the parents two days ago, so that makes it a total of 22.” Excuse you.

These cockroaches are disgusting. A creature should not be able to crawl and fly at the same time. One is fine, two is a bit much, but a whole nest of these giant, devilish creatures is way too much.

Finally the wasps. What is the purpose of a wasp? Do they make honey? Do they pollinate flowers? No. Wasps are specifically programmed to torture the human race. Wasps exist in the outside world and fly around, so you shouldn’t worry about them while inside the school, right? Wrong. Somewhere in the 300 hall, there is a whole nest of these creatures in a classroom. Why? I have no idea, but please get rid of them.

Maybe some of these tales were a bit exaggerated, but it still doesn’t mean that having all these creatures in a learning environment is correct. It’s kind of hard to focus on writing an essay when you’re worried about a cockroach falling in your hair.